Deciding When to Have the “Money Talk”

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As you are beginning to fall madly in love with your significant other, you may start to share details about your life with them that you would not think of sharing with anyone else. Of course, this occurrence in relationships is perfectly natural. As you get to know somebody intimately and romantically for a long period of time, you will develop a connection with them that makes you secure enough to drop your guard. When you are in this step of your relationship, you may be thinking of a long-term plan that consists of both of you spending your lives together. This plan, however, needs to be full proof, meaning that if you are considering making someone your life partner, you both have to have the “money talk.”

When going into this sensitive subject, the first thing you need to keep in mind is the fact that there is a possibility that this is not going to be an easy conversation to have. The second thing you have to do is ask yourself why you want to have it. Is it because you are just curious as to what your partner’s credit score is? Or are you trying to see if their spending habits are worse than your own? If it is the first question, you are being curious but be aware that your boyfriend or girlfriend might not be inclined to tell you.

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Therefore, you have to be in a state of your relationship that is not considered the “dating stage.” Once you two are actually considering moving into together, finances have to come up because you both have to be able to manage your individual and collaborative bills. Finances start to add up when you consider utilities, rent, loans, car payments etc. You also have to talk about what each of you make each month in terms of each of your jobs. In this economy, it would be difficult to have one person as the main bread winner, unless you two were married already where you two are willing to adjust to life changes.

You have to pay attention to each other’s spending habits and not be afraid to call out one another for unnecessary spending. Because you both are close and at such a pivotal step in your relationship, you should not hold anything back. If you cannot discuss the bad, like debt, then you will hurt each other financially in the future. You do not want to be side swiped by your partner’s financial burdens because you two did not take the time to bring up the “money talk.”


When you are in the point of your relationship where you believe that you want to spend the rest of your life with the person you are dating, you have to talk about your finances. This step is crucial because it will help you both determine if you two are truly ready to take the next step into a serious life together. If you or your significant other cannot talk in detail about potential financial struggles, then you both are not ready to move on together. Also, if you cannot change your bad habits when it comes to money, you are definitely not ready to get serious. Come up with a way to talk money. If you two find that you can have this conversation and come up with a plan that works to benefit both of you, then you can think in terms of long term goals.





Photo Via Photo Spin

About Stacy Narine

Originally from Paterson, NJ, I recently graduated from Seton Hall University with my B.A in English. I will be starting my M.A program in Literature at Seton Hall University in spring 2015. I love Pinterest, Photoshop, and writing fictional short stories about characters who are trying to establish a sense of individuality while in relationships. Ready to momentarily stray from fiction, I am motivated to write about topics that are important to women.

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